Everything about today sucked.
Well maybe not everything…During my plan time, I was in the office when a woman brought her daughter to school late. We recently got a security officer in our building for the sole purpose of protecting our principal and staff from this woman. There is a restraining order against her coming into the school. The security officer asked her to leave the premises and when she refused the cuffed her and called the police in front of her 7 year old daughter. She screamed and sobbed and ran down the hallway. I hugged her and sat with her for a good 40 minutes, we read a story and cuddled in the guidance office. Her mom was released and the little girl was unenrolled from the school.
Then I had to pick up my children and go teach reading intervention. At reading intervention, one of my students was sobbing because her uncle died that morning of cancer. I sat with her and hugged her for a bit. I felt like I could make a difference on that level. I could show my kiddos I love them, even if I can’t always teach them very well.
During lunch, I watched a sixth grader get extremely violent, lie on the ground and start kicking the walls. I had trouble getting by her to get my kids from lunch. When I picked up my kids from lunch, they were themselves. I love them.
During class, I had some kids on board but not as many as I’d like, there were moments of compliance which was nice. However as the afternoon progressed it got nuts. One kid punched another in the jaw and the other kid pushed a chair and desk over. Then a kid drew all over the wall and on my poster that I hand drew, then a child started taking things from my drawer, and I lost it. Sincerely and utterly lost it on a child, screamed my face off. I’m not proud.
The vice principal heard it.
She took my kids to the bus and asked to meet with me.
Cut to: I’m sitting in the principal’s office waiting, like one of my misbehaving students, to meet with the principal. She had told me that we need to get on the Professional Growth Plan (PGP) that she had talked to me about earlier (2 weeks ago or so) and basically that I had 30 school days to show growth or else be fired.
I hate this. Feeling like I have an ax over my head. I’d rather just be fired. This probationary thing sucks.
The meeting was an hour long.
Honestly, I have heard so many tips about how to make my classroom management better. In fact, I could probably give a lecture on how to make classroom management better, however I have no idea how to effectively implement it, consistently.
Maybe I should just quit.